Army Spouse Sound-Off

READING THESE MADE MY HEART ACHE! MILITARY MEMBERS SHOULD ALWAYS SPEND AS MUCH TIME POSSIBLE WITH THIER FAMILIES! I WANT TO SERVE MY COUNTRY OR I WOULD NOT BE HERE, BUT TO INFORCE DISCAPLINE(I AM A HORRIBLE SPELLER) BY MAKING ME COME IN ON A SATURDAY FOR AREA BEAUTIFICATION BECAUSE POLICE CALLS WERE NOT DONE PRIOR TO END OF DUTY HOURS FRIDAY IS REDICULOUS. I BELIEVE COMMANDERS, LEADERS, SECTION LEADERS SHOULD BE THE ONLY ONES THERE ON SATURDAY SINCE THEY DID NOT ENSURE IT WAS DONE BEFORE THE WEEKEND!

Um... excuse me, Exactly when... are we going to open on Wednesday mornings? Not that it matters, but I sure would like to conduct business during normal business hours. I grow weary of offices closing whenever the wind blows. (That's what it feels like.)

I did walk into ID card section yesterday (wednesday) only to find 3 soldiers (sitting) and nobody at the counters. Are we effectively utilizing hour resources?

You know, maybe we should cut PT to 2 days a weeks, and only if missions/tasks/responsibilities allow it. This may accomplish a couple of things.

-Those who WANT to promote will make an effort to stay in shape on their own time.

-This will free up, wait, I gotta take my shoes off... 8 hours a week... give or take. The 2 hours 'mandated' PT and the hour and a half of "hygeine" time. Imagine the meetings that could be held!! Imagine the work that could be accomplished!!!

So that's about 6 man hours per soldier... Multiply that by how many soldiers we have on post right now... roughly 15 thousand soldiers. (Calculator aquired) 90,000 man hours per week, re-dedicated to mission essential....stuff. That's not including the gas saved (carbon emissions), time lost to soldier on soldier vehicular accidents (to run home for a shower).

Sir, Train the soldiers, stop spoon feeding the soldiers. Its about time soldiers learn responsibility and personal accountibility. And so, PT is a good start!! You notice that those that WANT to promote (and deserve it) will. And I'll ask this question, "What can you do with 120,000 man hours? (a week)"

(Would this mean Soldiers could get to work BEFORE civilians? Not for nothing, but that would be nice;-)

Fort Drum by far has been the most organized for family support during deployment. With the deployed care, the spouses workout and childcare at Pine Plains and many other sources such as the car care cllinics. I do agree many do not have proper info about these so they are underused. But there is a bit avialable.

However, With the recent return of my husband now we are facing his third deployment. 12 months exactly "stablization". I find that term funny, because it does take so long for the family to find its functioning ground again and adapt. On top of the fact that my husband already has his training time mapped out for this "stabliliation" period. So they are state side, but our children still do not get to see daddy. What is this that we are reading about mandatory go home hours, does Drum not inact this? Sir, I have a husband who loves his job and is solely dedicated to it. However, if we are looking at 12 on (or more) and 12 sort of off every single year, even he, in this unstable economy, is thinking twice.. something has to be done.. this is what needs to be changed.

Sir -
While at Ft Drum, I couldn't put my finger on why the environment there is SO stressful, yet the Army (and Fort Drum) provides SO much to our Ft Drum families and soldiers in the way of support programs, MWR, etc. It baffled me why all these programs weren't utilized MORE (if at all) by the community. Now, I think I have to agree with everyone here who has suggested that the only solution is shorter deployment times, with a guarantee of 1 year non-deployed time before being eligible to be deployed again.

Other branches of the service have MUCH shorter deployment rotations. I'm curious if anyone has surveyed families from all branches of the service to see which branch has suffered the most divorces, violence/abuse, or retention issues?

It's hard to be "family strong" when the "heart" of our family is always gone, and in a combat zone to boot.

I have been a spouse of an active duty Soldier for over 10 years and also work on Fort Drum as a civilian. I am glad you have asked this question. I have a few points I would like to bring up.

1. Clark Hall Hours: I have gone to several offices in Clark Hall and have had issues with their hours of operation. I understand if there is training or meetings but how much can there be every week? The main office I have issues with is the ID Card office. I would love to work their hours, they are only open on Wednesdays from 1300-1520 and close their doors other days at 1520. What happens to the Soldiers, Contractors and Civilians if they have ID Card issues? You can not always predict when you will need a pin reset or have your ID Card chip no longer work to access computers It is very difficult to get an appointment, customer service is horrible and wait times for pin resets is ridiculous. I have come in before and they were closing their doors (at 1520) and told me to come back the next day. That was a two minute fix but was told they were closing and could not do it for me. That meant I could no longer work until the next day when they could see me and the whole time I am seeing the staff chatting and laughing. The next morning I came in for the pin reset and had to stand in a large line waiting for service, once again I see the staff chatting and no customer service. I could see if this was a one time incident but this is a reoccurring incident as I have had to come in on more than one occasion for service and have seen the same behavior. I know of many others that have faced the same treatment from that office. I know at one time there was a computer at the front desk that allowed for faster service for pin resets but I guess that is no longer?? Is there a way that you can get more pin reset machines throughout Clark Hall or even Fort Drum for faster more effective service? This would save Fort Drum thousands of dollars each year for personnel that can not access their computer and actually work for their paycheck.
2. Guthrie Clinic: Daycare issues. I can understand not bringing an active child with you to your other child’s appointment, but if you have an infant that is sleeping and are told you can not have your other child serviced is absurd. Also, is there anything being done to help parents register their children for this type of care? I am lucky enough not to have to worry about this issue but I have seen many spouses struggle with this.

"What do you think? Are the leaders at Fort Drum unable to manage time? Do I need to mandate when we release for the day or trust leaders to determine?"

I really think you need a mandate, I think a major problem is that there is no accountability behind why these soldiers are working these extra hours. I don't see it so much as hand-tying them but making them double think their decisions and being held accountable to higher authorities for these decisions. You would have leaders who would then ask themselves "is this really needed or do I need to think this through some more, is there a better way to solve this problem?"

It's not so much a problem of idle time in our unit but of someone getting upset and throwing a temper tantrum. When your spouse comes home on Wednesday and says that they have to come in on Saturday and Sunday because someone in the battalion got a DUI or because a certain section didn't finish what they needed too, is that really an effective use of time? You've just taken a weekend away from family time for soldiers that have nothing to do with either of those problems. Suddenly you are left telling kids why the movie can't happen or the parent can't be at the baseball game or left with a birthday that is happening on Saturday and suddenly Mom or Dad is being called into work to do a class A inspection because someone, somewhere got in trouble.

I think a mandate also needs to be in place to identify those units that are often not achieving what they need to do during the duty day. It will hold leaders accountable for what is going on in the units during the day. If a certain unit or section continuously has to work long hours or weekends to accomplish the tasks, then there is some breakdown of time management there that needs to be dealt with.

We all understand that there are valid reasons and times that working extra hours will need to happen. We know that things come up and will require the occasional extra time; containers need to be loaded and unloaded, inspections and inventories need to happen, the office needs a good cleaning, etc. I think thats the key to it though, mandating that there needs to be valid reasons, and I think that leaders really need to be held accountable as to why this could not get done during the duty day.

I see the conundrum. If you mandate work hours, you hamstring junior leaders at times. However, sometimes it is those very same junior leaders that get themselves into those situations. They go to a staff meeting or a directive comes from a company commander that an inventory, PMCS, etc. needs to be done on no notice.
With all due respect, even 1700 is a long day to be away from families when you consider most have to leave at 0530 to get to PT on time. Figure in an hour for breakfast and shower and 30 minutes for lunch. So it's 10 hour work day 5 days a week or a 50 hour work week.
I know PT is not "work", but the timing isn't optional. My spouse is a senior enlisted soldier, and has never gotten less than a 300 on his PT score, but he's never been rewarded with the option to do PT on his time/schedule. I understand that the soldiers who struggle with PT need the experts around for encouragement, but that could be rotated. I would love to be able to do PT before work, but because his is mandatory, it can never happen. If you rewarded the PT experts with the option to do PT on their time with a rotating PT supervisory schedule, you might even have more soldiers striving for that excellence so they too can be rewarded with that flexibility.

I don't know about other units, but, speaking from experience with my husband and his unit/current leadership, which he has been with since he was first stationed here back in 2004, there are some days where the time seems to be managed well, and then there are days where it's managed poorly. My husband is a Section Seargent, and I know he tries to make sure that there is little to no idle time during the day, and anything that needs to get done, gets done efficiently... However, through no fault of my husband's, there are times when the day seems to be VERY mismanaged: they end up sitting around doing nothing (these are my husband's words) until all of a sudden, at 1500 or 1600, they are having to rush around to try to get something done so they can still get off on time.

My husband's current leadership is MUCH better than it has been at times in the past over the last five years, but I think in anything there's ALWAYS room for improvement.

As the spouse of a soldier, I can definitely see the benefit in and could appreciate having mandated work hours... But I can also see your concern that in doing so will be displaying a lack of trust.

As I said, some units are probably better than others at managing their time... So I'm really not sure if it is completely necessary or not. As a wife, though, I think it would be wonderful for the families if our soldiers were guaranteed to be home by a certain time, and would not be called in on weekends.

Thanks for asking this question and taking the time to listen to our suggestions.

This is our first deployment. We have been married almost 9 years. My husband is th "old man" in his unit, joining the Army at age 40. He joined because he beleives in his country and because he needed work.

Most spouses will try and find the answers to any questions they have and there are a lot of resources. If one place doesn't know the answer they will probably be able to send you in the right direction.

Anyway, my suggestion is regarding travel. I haven't seen anything on here yet. Recently, my daughter and I flew to the west coast to visit my mother in law. It would be beneficial to have an inexpensive shuttle/taxi service between Drum and Syracuse and even Rochester. Since we have to travel to one of these places to get to major transportation a shuttle would be a convenient way to get there.

Also, if FMWR would offer more day trips or even weekend trips, I would be game. I can't drive far by myself and would definitely take advantage of these, especially during the summer when my daughter can enjoy them.

And I agree with Rebecca K, a nice kid friendly cafe type of place here on post would be awesome!!!
Once again, thanks for listening.

Totally agree with satellite programs for children of deployed soldiers. When we moved here 9 years ago the only housing available was in Clayton, when it came time to buy a house it seem ridiculous to pull our kids out of the school and away from their friends when they were already dealing with their father deploying, so we bought a house in the Clayton are. This has kept us, not by our choice, completely isolated from any services that are offered on base.

I appreciate, Sir, your asking this question and being willing to really listen to the answers/opinions people have to offer.

My husband is a SSG with one of the units of 2BCT, so, as you know, he will be deploying soon. This will be our third deployment since getting married about five and a half years ago.

There was more time between this deployment and the previous one than there was between our first and second deployments, but when you factor in time away from family for training, field exercises, TDY, etc, there is still a lot of time that Army couples spend apart even when the soldier is stateside.

I realize that there is no way around that, as it is an integral part of the soldier's job and duty; however, as was previously mentioned, the Army's deployment time is the longest of any of the military's branches of service. As was also previously mentioned, there have been numerous studies that have concluded the mental health of our soldiers - and now also their spouses and children - is in serious decline and trouble. (Honestly, though, any soldier, spouse or child would have told you that, had they been asked. They didn't have to do a study to figure that out!) This is due in part to the frequent deployments and to the length of time spent away from home, and, more importantly, away from family.

By shortening the overall length of the deployments and/or increasing the length of time spent stateside, you allow more time to recover from the previous tour, which in turn eases the stress and strain on the soldiers and the families: More holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, and other special events can be spent together, more time is available to work through family crises, and, additionally, could allow for more time for training, etc., but wouldn't have to occur so often or close together. To put it simply: 12 months is just not enough time home when you subtract the time spent in training, in schools, in the field, etc, and then ask for seemingly back-to-back deployments of 12 months with only two weeks of R&R leave to come home to see family.

Another option - but not as desirable, in my opinion - is to somehow make communication between deployed soldiers and their families easier, more readily available, and more frequent. There were times when my husband was deployed that I did not talk to him, either via email or phone, for a few WEEKS, if not closer to a month or more. I really feel that is just shameful! I know when they are deployed there are missions, blackouts, etc, but in the technologically advanced age we live in now, shouldn't I be able to talk to my husband more than just once a month, even though, yes, he is on the other side of the world? I know of many wives and significant others who feel the same way. Then, when you factor in those families who have children, is it any wonder why our military children are utilizing mental health care services more frequently than the general population? At least being able to speak more frequently with our deployed soldier would bring SOME peace of mind and ease the stress of the deployment to a SMALL degree.

Again, I want to thank you for posing this question and taking the time to read everyone's responses.

As a side note: I am 24 yers old, and 35 weeks pregnant with our first child. We have been stationed at Fort Drum for five of the six years my husband has been serving in the Army. Only during our first deployment did I stay with family, and that was because he deployed within two weeks of our getting married, and we did not have housing or anywhere for me to live yet here in Fort Drum/Watertown. I work full-time outside of the home, and am, as some other folks have put it, extremely independent, TYVM.

MG Oates,

I, personally, appreciate everything that the Army and Fort Drum does for families of deployed soldiers.

I have to disagree with the negative comments about the FRGs and the "lazy wives". Some girls just don't know how to take care of the "guy chores" and should not be condemned, but pointed in the right direction. I'm sure that many places on post and in town would be willing to have a class on how to change a tire, weedwack a yard, etc. There are many resources offered to spouses, but apparently they have no clue about it. I suppose such groups like the Hearts Apart will have to advertise more.

As for group outings mentioned in previous comments, it is hard for an FRG to get together with spouses if their opinions are that we're just a bunch of gossipers. As a FRG leader, I do have many spouses and parents that appreciate the time and effort that I put into the position, others don't seem to. With it being a volunteer position, sometimes it is difficult to maintain with the negative comments or unsuccessful planned events. It is a lot of work and takes up much of my time, but I truly care about our soldiers and their families, so I do not mind it. But after reading some of the comments from other spouses, it seems like their FRGs may not be as organized and therefore aren't getting the necessary information (they would have to care somewhat or else they wouldn't have taken the 8 hour course). Maybe if they felt more appreciated they would try harder.

I think the hardest part of a deployment is the emotional hardships, mainly on the children. I understand that deployments come with the job, and cutting the time in half or even to 9 months may not be an option. However, kids need a fatherly figure around and it is difficult for a spouse to fulfill without looking like they are cheating. The Half Way Home party was great. Besides the wonderful day of free bouncers, pedal cars, food, atv rides, banner making, etc etc; my son and his friend (both 2 1/2 years old) interacted with some of the male soldiers and they had a great time. Maybe there could be some kind of program every month or so, or if there is maybe they could pass the information along to the FRGs.

In closing, I really enjoy the opportunity to voice my opinion and I appreciate the interaction you provide with these blogs! Thank you.

In a couple of posts I couldn't help but notice the scathing tone of some wives thinking that these classes should be mandatory before certain things can happen. Sounds great in theory, but many women have careers and work obligations of their own aside from being geographically single parents.
I was intensely pressured by many to be active in my FRG then to take the courses once I was arm-twisted into being a key caller, leader, treasurer etc. The problem is the courses were always offered during my work hours, and announced way too late for me to be able to request time-off.
I'm thrilled that the courses are available to those that have flexible enough lives to accomodate attendance, but be careful not to shun the spouses who cannot sacrifice their career for an AFTB class or a last minute FRG luncheon on a weekday.

Shorter deployments would be the best. Some times I wish there was more help. I work full-time and have an infant so it is pretty hard to get things done around the house. With no family here it isnt easy to just pick up the phone and call someone when you need an extra set of hands. It also can get pretty costly to call a handyman, repairman or contractor to fix things that break.

I would like to see a system set up so that local community families could volunteer to adopt the families of soldiers who come to the north country. Best if it could start out even before their move especially so that a smoother relocation could be enabled.

This would accomplish many things - It would enable locals to show their support of the troops, give a base of possibly an extended an locally knowledgeable support network, provide emotional and social support, babysitting, backup in sickness, information on places to go and other resources, possible help with home chores and repairs, and an endless myriad of other important intangeable benefits.

Sir, I Co Chair a Non for Profit troop organization in the western suburbs of Chicago. We know many soldiers who have deployed and are currently deployed in the 10th Mountian Div.
Since the families that I am in contact with are not close to the base, I can not comment on many of the issues that are mentioned in this blog. However the one single problem that I see over and over again with the loved ones left behind during a deployment is THE LENGTH OF THE DEPLOYMENT NEEDS TO BE SHORTENED TO 6 - 7 MONTHS. PERIOD. The stress level of an extended deployment that lasts over a year is can destroy even the most stable family (who has outside support in the community). Many civilians like myself feel very strongly about this.

With all do respect, Sir, there are days when I think the installation / Army does too much for spouses. There have been HUGE improvements to services at Fort Drum in the last 7 years, yet people want more but do less.
18 years ago, this starry eyed wife of a PV2 lived without an internet to research moves. I, OMG, went to the library, AAA, called installations and, shocker, talked to people. Functioned through separations courtesy of the military by letter writing, paying phone bills (without the extra "entitlements") and reading repair books or calling my family. Didn't complain about it. Just did it. Now, if a website is down it is as if the world ended.
We helped his Soldiers in need because it was the right thing to do. We did Friday potluck lunches in his work area. Celebrated together, supported each other. Now, a NCO is more likely to call authorities than help a Soldier. Spouses don't know what unit their Soldier is in, let alone where it is or what the Soldier's work area looks like. Soldiers work together without knowing the guy beside them is married or the guy across the bay has an autistic son. Spouses spout the "it isn't my life" when ask why they aren't more involved.
Raised 4 kids who adore their father, miss him terribly when he isn't around, and enjoy every second he is. The dog hasn't even forgotten him. It's priorities. Yes, the deployment cycle is brutal. But I can name 20 Soldiers and spouse easily who will take their kids to a friends house and go out and get drunk every weekend. Another 20 where the Soldier goes out and the spouse stays home with the kids. What is wrong with staying home? Double bonus ... family is stronger and DUIs go down.
Now, is the whining about $50 for internet in country ... "why can't the military pay for it?" Meanwhile, a married Soldier (not dual military) gets a minimum of $600 extra a month. 16 hours of free childcare each month. Scholarships / Grants for spouses wishing to return to school. Accomodation for spouses to get assistance with careers. Etc, etc.
Seriously, I think the Army should pass the policy of no cell phones for Soldiers during deployments. Aviation manned up and banned them ... best decision. Personal internet and webcams are okay but they have to be disabled right along with everything else during a blackout. Maybe not having a Soldier so readily available will make the spouse a little more independent. With the added bonus of cutting rumors WAY down.
Free childcare? Only if the spouse attends an AFTB class or Coping with Separation class.
Oh .... how about not keeping quarters when a spouse decides to leave during a deployment? Force them to REALLY think about the choice. Maybe more will stay AT Fort Drum and family issues will cut down.

I truly don't know when the Army went to more handholding and less empowering. Main reason I now count down to the walk across the stage in 1 year, 8 months, 1 week.

I find it interesting that FRG is thought to be the solution to everything. Every FRG that I have attempted to be involved with (and that is pre and post 9/11) has turned out to be a clique of "girls" who have no clue what it really means to be a military wife. And the predeployment briefs have been completely insulting. I don't have time to sit through lectures on "paying bills while my husband is gone" and "what to do in an emergency" I feel that if you are adult enough to get married and have children then you should be adult enough to handle life situations that come your way...whether it be mowing your own lawn, paying your bills, or dealing with family crisis. Almost all of my contact here is with local people and at times I have been embarrassed to admit I am a "military wife". I am extremely proud of my husband but the impression that most people have of wives is that we are unreliable, lazy, and sponge off our husbands. An improvement would be to see some sort of program that teaches the "lost" spouses that being independent is the only option for surviving a deployment. This may be out there already, but I would say a majority of the FRGs are nothing more than gossip circles and this information is never passed on.

As an army spouse of 16 yrs and 6 deployments I feel the Army has improved a lot of stuff. When the deployments started back in 98 we didn't have half the stuff we have now. Life is not easy and you can do all the complaining you want. But we choose to marry our spouse who serve full time. With the world now days being what it is how could you not know they will not get deployed. It has been away in life for my family and we are proud of what my husband/dad does. I do have my breakdowns now and again. My children are ages 11 and down. Trust me all the Army offers a lot more than we ever got.I just want to say Ft Drum has one of the best support bases than alot others. My husband is now deployed and i am glad they offer the free day care and all. What is hard about the deployments is the emotional help and there is no way the Army can't help with that. Our children need it just as much as we do. Its just hard on how this all effects our kids. I think as parents we get the help but the children not as much. Sports help but it doesn't take there minds off of missing dad. Thats what I find hard about the deployments. So i there could be more ways to help them that would be great.

Thank you, Sir, for asking, though, I fear you will be inundated with the minutiae of the daily battles spouses face while soldiers are thousands of miles away.

I've endured now 5 deployments before and after we had children. I've been a grad student, commuted long distances to internships, moved multiple times, managed finances, been pregnant, reared toddlers, troubleshot major power outages during the dead of winter, traversed long evaluation and diagnosis processes for a special needs child....all while working full-time and being married to a spouse who has been away from home more than %60 of the time. (On one of my angry days, I actually sat down and did the math.)

My husband is a good father, and loves his children very much, but to them, he is a novelty because he's rarely home to spend any time with them. Skype has been great this deployment, but it's not reliable -particularly during dust storms which seem to be endless this summer. Even when it's working well, it's not a substitute for the human contact both the soldier and his or her family craves and needs.

Bottom line, the research our country has done and is still doing all points to the same answer when looking at mental health of the soldier, the spouse, and the children. SHORTER DEPLOYMENTS. Figure on 6 month deployments. They are still gone 7 months instead of 6 when you consider BNCOC, ANCOC, TDY for MOS-specific schools, field problems, JRTC, NTC, etc.

I read the headline a week or two ago about yet another study on deployed soldiers families and how children of those soldiers used/required mental health services far more than the general population. When are we going to stop pouring money into studies like these, and instead pour it into the justifiable cost of shorter deployments? Don't our soldiers already sacrifice enough? Do they now have to knowingly sacrifice the mental health of their children too?

Change the policy at Githrie Clinic,my husband is deployed on his third tour.We have 4 children and the policy that the clinic has is crazy.If 1 child has an appt I can not take my other children in unless they are in a stroller or infant carrier.With my husband constantly being gone it is extremely diffucult to find a babysitter on short notice or to even pay expensive amounts.I understand that its easier to only have 1 child in the room but for spouses that have no one to turn to when you have a Drs appt the policy is hard for us.Cnanging that would make sick kids a lil easier to deal with when you can just get them to see a Dr and not wait to get a sitter and an appt.

Proud spouse of a Soldier

Ashley Tokoi pretty much said it all.

There are many of us out there who "do it all" and don't ask for a pat on the back for it. Frankly I don't need it. My situation is different to Ashley's in that I have only one child...but I also have 3 horses, 3 dogs, cats and 40 acres of farm to handle...on my own. I also have a "real job" outside of the home job. I don't ask for handouts. I don't take advantage of the ridiculous "freebies" offered under the Family Covenant (because, frankly, I think it's ridiculous and it should be offered to only those of E-5 and below rank). I've done this all between deployments and since my child was an infant..and she's now 9 years old.

The army has created a pack of DEPENDENTS as opposed to a pack of independents. Where do I see it most? I'd like to say it's in the younger generation...but I know a good handful of my generation who are an embarrassment to me.

So what do you do?

You make it work. Thousands of single-parenting women who aren't military affiliated do it every day. What makes us any different? Nothing. Sure, our spouses and significant others are deployed. It's their JOB. Get over it. And if you can't...then move on. Don't be a burden to others because you don't have the intestinal fortitude to handle it. You're an embarrassment to yourself and the rest of us.

But for the record, I'll be expecting Genevieve Rhone at my place at 8 am sharp on Saturday to help mow the fields, school the horses, do some stalls and hang up my bug zappers. Oh yeah. And the fenceline needs repair. Of course, my daughter and I will be there to assist. She makes great lemonade and wields a mean stall fork. Thanks.

Sir, I think there are a few things that would be helpful for me and my fellow spouses. My sense is that my ideas would fall to either Brigade or Battalion Rear Detatchment to coordinate, and no matter how much a spouse may need support or information, there are many spouses who simply will not take the initiative to seek the help provided to them. However, I have also seen in my experience as a key caller, that there are many spouses who would take advantage of the following:

*Casualty Notification Brief. Many spouses are scared and overwhelmed at the thought of their soldier deploying. The months prior to deployment are always very busy and usually involve transition of some sort for the family. It may be helpful to have this briefing offered to spouses again perhaps around the 3-month mark of deployment as families begin to settle into deployment mode and as those tough questions and worries begin to inevitably surface. For spouses who leave town, it may be helpful to have the briefing material sent out in some form be it on paper, powerpoint or dvd.

*Community Resources Fair. Many Battalions have started doing an info fair during their predeployment briefings and it seems that this is very successful. It may be helpful to do another fair for spouses around the 3-6 month mark of deployment. This fair could include local school representatives, housing, medical, efmp, cdc, red cross, deers and etc. to give the spouses another opportunity to speak with and access information from subject matter experts.

As I said, not all spouses will actively seek solutions to their problems, but spouses who may not be able to attend these events during the pre-deployment time frame would benefit greatly from these sorts of things.

Thank you for asking!!!!

tHE ARMY ALREADY HAS A PRETTY GOOD SYSTEM IN ACTION NOW TO ASSIST WITH THE SPOUSE WHILE THIER LOVED ONE IS DEPLOYED. MY HUSBAND AND I ARE BOTH IN THE MILITARY AND ALOT OF TIMES WE ARE DEPLOYED AT DIFFERENT TIMES. HE FINALLY WAS ABLE TO BE TRANSFERED TO THE SAME UNIT I AM IN HERE SO NOW AFTER 7 YEARS WE WILL BE DEPLOYED TOGTHER HOPEFULLY. MY POINT IS THAT ALOT OF THE UNITS HERE DO NOT HAVE QUAILIFIED FRG LEADERS. FOR EXAMPLE, i WAS TALKINING TO MY NEIGHBORS ABOUT THEIR SON AND HOW HE SHOULD BE ENROLLED IN THE EFMP PROGRAM DUE TO HIS DISABILITIES. THE WIFE LOOKED AT ME, MIND YOU SHE IS AN FRG LEADER HERE ON POST AND ASKED WHAT EFMP WAS. THAT WAS JUST ONE EXAMPLE I COULD GO ON FOR A LONG TIME ABOUT A NUMBER OF FRG LEADERS AND WIVES/HUSBANDS I HAVE TALKED TO THAT DON'T KNOW WHAT PROGRAMS THERE ARE OUT THEIR IN THE ARMY TO HELP THEM AND THIER FAMILIES. i THINK THAT THERE SHOULD BE A CLASS THAT THE FRG LEADERS OR SPOUSES AND OR A REP FOR EACH UNIT CAN GO TO THAT EXPLAINS IN DETAIL ALL OF THE PROGRAMS THAT ARE OUT THERE. i KNOW THAT PEOPLE HAVE TOLD ME THERE ARE SUCH CLASSES, BUT IF THAT IS THE CASE THEN WHY ARE SO MANY SPOUSES NOT GETTING THE INFORMATION?

Sir,

My opinion - The answer is in the question, "What more can we do as an installation or Army to assist Army spouses of deployed Soldiers during these year-long deployments?"

Answer: Cut the deployment time in half.

The Army has the longest deployment time in DoD. Most deployments of our Sister Services are 6-7 months...a much more manageable time frame for families to work within when it comes to separation issues.

Consider a Soldier deployed for 6-7 months...they may miss a couple major holidays, a few birthdays, and maybe an anniversary or birth. However, a Soldier deployed for 12-15 months will most likely miss EVERY holiday, EVERY birthday, and EVERY anniversary and birth
for the year they're gone.

My son-in-law is a U.S. Marine, who is heading out on his second deployment to Iraq (7 months). He just returned from there Oct 08. His daughter was born during the first deployment (Jun 08), and with this second deployment (Aug 09), he will end up missing 11 months out of her first 21 months of her being alive. The key though is that he has been able to connect with her (and my daughter) in between deployments, and I have watched how they have worked out family issues during this time while also getting ready for his second deployment. This shorter cycle time seems more hopeful and less daunting, than say trying to run the entire marathon in one race.

Deployments for families (no matter how long) are all about maintaining connections to their loved ones, and it's time to Drum up some chatter on how the U.S. Army can efficiently and effectively deploy their forces for 6-7 months, and start giving our brave men and women and their families a little more connection time to work with on the family front.

Maybe a few Black Belts from Lean Six Sigma could do the heavy lifting on the merits of this idea...


Respectfully,

Army Civilian,
MSgt, USAF Retired

As the spouse of a soldier who has been deployed in back to back rotations, I am able to cope quite well. The only stumbling block for me is when it comes to medical. I have 4 kids that are 10 and under. So I am always in need of care if one of them needs to go to the Dr. Not to mention when I need an appointment. I try to schedule when they are at school, but it seems that most available appointments for yearly checkups are either before the kids start school, or after they get out. Neither of those work for me. I would love if Guthrie had a drop off daycare on site. I know that I am eligible for free hourly care at the CDC, but registering them is too much of an inconvenience. I am aware that Guthrie is currently expanding, and I hope that a drop-off childcare room is part of the plan. Other than that, I have no other problems. Thank you for trying to make life easier on us!